A year ago, this Friday I had the worst first date I’ve ever had.

I was going to Forthcoming with my best friend Nick Hage.  At first he just asked me to Forthcoming, but the week of Forthcoming a friend of mine told him to ask me out. And he did. And stupidly, I said yes. Our first date was a disaster. The girl, Stephanie, who was supposed to come with us as a double date bailed leaving us alone with her date, Clainie. This kid is super obnoxious and was bent on making the whole night awkward.

I made it through dinner trying not to feel too awkward. We got in the car with me sitting in between the guys. When we were about halfway to the school, Nick starts telling Clainie about the time he was flashed by a car full of college girls and how amazing it was. Very much not the best story to tell your girlfriend on your first date.

Once we got to the dance I thought it would get better. It didn’t. Nick lost his ID card and for a while we thought he wouldn’t be able to get in. I remember that I couldn’t decide if that was a good thing or not because of how dinner had just gone. Finally his mom showed up and she had found it. Once we were finally inside we started dancing. At every slow dance Clanie kept ignoring his date and talking to me instead, ruining the only romantic part of the evening.  Not only was this annoying for Nick and me, but it also severely ticked off his date.

Needless to say, this relationship did not work out.